I never, ever believed I would turn into “that person,” but I did after about two hours without my smartphone.
Woke up Friday morning and all I saw on the screen was an apple icon. Couldn’t get it to do nothing. Called in my expert, DeGlopper. He hooked up his laptop to it and the screen went to red. The diagnosis was grim. It may be shot.
But DeGlopper said, “you’ve got all this info on here backed up, right?” Short answer … No.
I got a second opinion. It’s kaput. The bride made me get a third opinion from the apple folks. Dust.
I began to panic and broke out into a cold sweat. All my contact information that I’ve amassed in more than two years had evaporated. All the photos of family and friends lost in the Ethernet, whatever that is. This much talked of “cloud” could be my savior. Turns out I never set up my stuff to go up to the “cloud.” Therefore if it never went up it ain’t never coming down.
I’m a man without portfolio. I don’t have any mobile connections to the world. It’s now day three. After the bride spoke with a delightful ATT representative and resolved to take our account to a rival carrier, said representative came around to our way of thinking … we want another phone for free.
I’m told it is to arrive on my doorstep on Tuesday. Until then I feel less than whole. The world is spinning and I know nothing.
I’ve turned into “that person” and I really don’t care for it. As you can see, the stress has effected (or is it affected) my writing. I can hardly put together a coherent sentence. Of course, some people may have been of the opinion I couldn’t put together a sentence prior to this unpleasant episode.
Oh, well. To resort to cliche, “it is what it is.”
GOOD NEWS, BAD NEWS
I compiled the East Ridge Police Department’s arrest report for the week and was stunned. For the week of Feb. 29 to March 6, our men and women in blue took 29 people to the Hamilton County Jail for various offenses. On Saturday alone, the cops arrested seven people, for goodness sake.
For the past three years, since the publication of East Ridge News Online, the average weekly arrests have been about 13 or so. What is the significance of 29 arrests?
Are the cops working harder? Should I feel better that police officers are getting more of the bad guys (remember, an arrest does not necessarily mean someone is guilty of a crime) off the street? Or should I feel worse that the number reflects more crime being committed in our fair city?
Maybe arrests have gone up because ERPD is at or near full staff. Chief J.R. Reed has hired 13 officers since becoming police chief. The new guys and gals are enthusiastic about going out in the street and enforcing the law.
I’m anxious to see what the arrest figures look like next week. Maybe the 29 is a freak. Maybe not.
GOOD NEWS
Last week ERNO reported on the city purchasing six Automated External Defibrillators (AED). The AEDs will be placed in Camp Jordan Park and in several city buildings to make sure that if somebody falls out with a sudden cardiac arrest, it might not be a death sentence. Officials said the devices, which will be housed in a white box marked “Defibrillator,” are easy for citizens to use and darned near “idiot proof.” Open the lid and voice instructions along with graphics walk a person through the steps to help revive someone whose ticker has stopped.
Park officials said that all the youth league coaches and staff down there are required to take some courses through the state that make them more aware of cardiac issues and concussion issues. Now the city has some tools that very well could save a life.
BAD NEWS
In reporting the story, I misidentified one of East Ridge’s firefighters. Lt. Jeff Duncan was pictured with the AEDs at the No. 1 Fire Hall. I got his first name wrong, calling him “Chad.”
Apparently this reputation that firefighters have of chiding their own is not without merit. When I discovered my mistake (and quickly corrected it) I was told by a senior fire official that it was OK. Everyone at the fire hall had been having a good time with “Chad.”
Lt. Duncan, please accept my most sincere apology for misidentifying you in the photograph. As a gesture of goodwill, lunch is on me the next time you go to the Corner Cafe. It’s the least I can do.
NEWS
Most opinion pieces in East Ridge News Online are posted without a photograph or art element. When opinions are shared on Facebook, often times an ad appears next to the post, which sometimes may be confusing.
In an attempt to keep it from not being confusing, ERNO had a “default” graphic image that was a red background and said “Breaking News.” Well, that doesn’t work for an opinion piece. That graphic should be reserved for events in our community of real consequence that are continuing to unfold.
As a solution, I asked our technology expert, Matthew DeGlopper, to come up with something more suitable. I was pleased and surprised when the new “default” image was created. It’s an orange background with many of the headings which appear in ERNO, like “community,” “news,” “sports” and the like. I couldn’t quite figure out what the shape of the graphic represented, though.
I thought to myself wouldn’t that be even more attractive if it was in the shape of the iconic “Pioneer” bust that is so much a part of the city’s heritage.
When I asked DeGlopper about this he told me the shape of the image represents the physical borders of our city. Then I saw it. Georgia all to the south, with Chattanooga on the west, north and east.
Now I like it even more.
